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Wednesday. 6.10.15 4:10 am
It's 8:30 and S and I are on the treadmills, working off a long day of whatever we did (she worked, I...somethinged). We're at one of the lamer chain gyms (hint: it tries to give you free pizza, on Mondays, as though we're dogs who need to receive regular treats for a good behavior), and it is PACKED, mostly full of weird guys who keep awkwardly and openly gawking at us. Ew.

This is not Love Connection, dudes.


I'm having a nice little jog while she walks off the elliptical round we just went through, and we're talking about the possibility of getting our boyfriends together, because, surprise, her boyfriend is a loyal member of the gym next door, and my boyfriend has been scoping that place out like he's casing the joint for a job. We're scheming about getting them to meet so that we can make our boyfriends be friends together and have cute couple outings as cute couple friends, and that's when it hits me:

Hooooly crap, who am I.

Like, add that to the ongoing list of things I never thought I would see; I'm in a happy, growing relationship, I have a gym membership that I pay for, I'm looking at buying myself a car, and I'm planning out these disgustingly cute things to do as a working adult with our other couple friends--because couple friends are great and I love the idea, damn it!

I learned how to program the coffee maker, tonight.

He and I sometimes discuss things like having an apartment together, in six months.

This probably isn't a big deal...just, I've been using a campus gym, for the past five years. I didn't know all of the factors that go into calculating a credit score until, like, January of this year (because I'd never had a credit card, before). I've been single since the 11th grade. You have to understand, this is all coming at once, and it's just...

The other night, I found myself popping open two bottles of beer and kicking back with Chinese takeout and a movie with this gorgeous, stubble-y version of the guy I had a crush on when we were eighteen, and suddenly, it hit me that he and I have a legitimate chance of ending up together that we may not have had, had we gotten together earlier in life. It just...blows me away, and it seems like he's just as confused and awestruck. Today, I found myself trotting around Home Depot with a succulent in one hand and an aloe plant in the other, because he mentioned once that he wants to start a little succulent garden with me. He says it's a symbol for our relationship, because succulents grown out of a harsh environment.

I got the aloe plant because, even though I think this is incredibly corny and disgusting, I wanted to remind him that things heal. He still beats himself up about all the lost years.

But it's more like...a shelf falling, so that, when you put it back up, you're sure to reinforce it enough.

I don't know, good things are happening.

[edit] I showed him the plants today and he didn't even know what to do with himself
Recommended by 1 Member

That's great. And as weird as it seems, the "new" you is HAPPY! Can you believe it?! :D
Timing/the cosmos/karma/whatever seems to have a funny way of working stuff out, sometimes. Being single for so long, then being in a nice, happy relationship now that you've lived some life have all worked together to bring you where you are, to where you can be now that you've come so far. Sometimes I think whatever-is-out-there knows what's up.

Happy you! Good luck with all that sappy, cute stuff. X)
» invisible on 2015-06-10 07:31:35

This is such a nice entry. I'm really happy for you. :)
» randomjunk on 2015-06-11 04:46:18

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