Ehhh. I know I need to give myself time to adjust, but I haven't been completely honest, and there's a very good reason as to why I want to leave: I chose an art area that I'm good at, and took the pride from the praise as liking the actual art.

Which I do not. Not enough to write this much, ever.

And that seems like a really dirty thing. So my parents called my counselor to talk to me, and I told her this, and she told me I'm really insightful but that I should give it a chance.

For what, the food? Because honestly, if I stay for things other than the art, it shouldn't be have "Arts" right in the name (false advertising and all that). Don't get me wrong--the people are great, the campus is beautiful, the academic side seems kind of almost fun.

But I'm just a kid, in some ways. I still make mistakes about reading my emotions, though I don't think that changes with age, even. We all do it; just, some make bigger mistakes than others.

I mean, this place HAS changed me a slight bit. I know how colorful I can be, now. I know what it's like to stand for something truly unique.

But I don't know. I miss my hot glue gun. I miss the freedom of coming home and taking off my shoes, and throwing them somewhere, and picking up my room when *I* want, and peeing without worrying abut being heard, and sleeping with all my dream catchers, and NOT HAVING TO WRITE ALL THE TIME (oh yeah, and talking to my friends. Oops, sorry, guys).

I have homework, tonight, too. Writing. More writing. That's it.

And I dunno.

I don't want to raise hopes or have you guys disappointed in me because I didn't "try." Because I might still have to stay.

v.v

Just a little buyer's remorse. Writing what you write now isn't the art, it's the practice to hone the art. So it's worth it to go through some hard work.
» Bartholomew on 2008-08-18 10:02:18

Everyone needs some time to adjust to new surroundings, I'm sure you'll be doing just fine in a couple more weeks. Good luck with your homework!
» Nuttz on 2008-08-19 09:25:04

yeah I know, but work won't let me download it. I have it at home lol
» AmbyrJayde on 2008-08-20 07:58:14

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